A Self-Compassion Evening
Designed by Bearmore
Inspired by Helen MarieSome days you're the one who’s been hardest on yourself.
Soften how you talk to yourself before you head into sleep. An evening Burst inspired by Helen Marie's psychotherapy work: a few rounds of conscious breathing, some reading, one self-compassionate question, and a short writing session.
The runsheet
Ten minutes of slow breathing
Breath workHelen's therapeutic protocol starts with the body before the mind. Ten minutes of slow nasal breathing as the day is coming to a close. Self-compassion lands easier when the body is starting to relax.
10 min activityBearmore’s thoughts on doing breath work before reading (mindful)
This can be a good pairing because a calm, focused state from breath work can carry into mindful reading and sustained attention.
Easy reading for twenty minutes
Reading (mindful)Twenty minutes with a book that doesn't ask anything too much of you. Helen has spoken about reading-as-rest as one of the practices she makes sure she gets to most evenings. Fiction or essays; nothing that’s trying to improve you.
20 min activityBearmore’s thoughts on doing reading (mindful) before self-guided inquiry
This works well because reading often surfaces themes that inquiry can explore more deeply.
Kind inquiry
Self-guided inquiryHelen's signature inquiry: what would I say to a friend who had a day like I did? Sit with it for fifteen minutes. The answer is often softer than the one you were giving yourself.
15 min activityBearmore’s thoughts on doing self-guided inquiry before journaling
This pairing is especially effective because writing can help capture raw ideas before they fade or turn into the same thoughts cycling again.
One page of journaling
JournalingFifteen minutes writing about what came up in your inquiry. Helen often coaches writing in the second person to yourself, the way you'd write to someone you love. The writing doesn’t need to be eloquent.
15 min activityTime well spent.
1h 12m spent doing something good for yourself.
The breakdown
Burst evaluation
Wellbeing focus
About this Burst
Helen Marie is a UK psychotherapist, counsellor, and host of the I Don't Think We Talk Enough podcast. Author of CHOOSE YOU. Posts on mental health, self-compassion, and emotional resilience. 432K followers on @h.e.l.e.n.m.a.r.i.e.